Fannie Polokowski

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Down near the Sangre de Cristo mountains in what would become Huerfano county, there was a small creek that ran out onto the plains. The creek had several names. Dead snake creek. Molly’s disaster. Coldwater. The name changed as often as new people arrived. Since much of this area hadn’t even been officially mapped you could name things any name you wanted. If you put up a wooden sign that made it even more official.

Where the creek came down from the mountainside there was a nice little valley. It was flat enough you could put tents up and nearby there were plenty of trees so you could have firewood handy and even make enough lumber from the small sawmill Lee Osgood brought with him from Northern Wisconsin. Soon a few rough sheds got stood up back off the creek aways. As time went on and the creek began to yield a little color more buildings were put up and it almost began to look like a little town.

It was about this time that a small family named Karl and Fannie Polokowski moved to the camp, which was then called Deadman’s Laughter after an incident where Ben Collins, the town drunk, stabbed a man named Jessimire Craigson to death in a fight over a bottle of Mescal. Mr. Craigson lingered for nearly three days and the sounds he made were close to what a man laughing would make, except much higher pitched almost woman-like. It was eerie and for several years after people would say they could hear Jessimire Craigson screaming in the night. Although that was almost for certain the wind coming down off the Sangre de Cristo mountains.

The Polokowski’s came to town in an old wagon weighted down with all kinds of farming implements as Karl had the idea he could farm some and provide the camp with fresh vegetables for a nice tidy profit. Unfortunately he hadn’t researched the area and didn’t know that it rarely rained here in what is the high desert, and the stream didn’t flow strong enough in the summer after the snow melt had run off to do much good for irrigation. After crop after crop failed he wound up selling most of his equipment to the local blacksmith who refashioned it into what ever the miners needed in the way of tools.

Fannie meanwhile took in washing and did some sewing and generally tried to help bring in some income to supplement the meager family income. It was 1887 that year and Karl thought he could go back to Wisconsin and convince a couple of his brothers to move out here and maybe they would build houses as there were plenty of miners but no builders around. The camp was getting bigger, what with families moving there and now there were kids and they needed a school, and a church, and all sorts of  buildings so Karl ever the optimist set out to bring his brothers back.

There were still a few remnants of the Cheyenne and Arapaho’s around. Those that didn’t get scattered or killed as the settlers moved in. They lived off the land as they always had and were never in one place twice so they didn’t get rounded up and shipped off somewhere like the others. They were mostly friendly and easy to get along with as long as you didn’t give them any whiskey which of course Karl did, and as the night progressed they finished off the three bottles that Karl had with him and they finished off Karl too.

A couple of month’s went by and Fannie didn’t hear anything from Karl. She wrote a couple of letters to Karl’s brother Albert but he wrote back saying Karl never got there. It began to look grim for Fannie as she was nearly destitute and Karl’s brothers weren’t very forthcoming with money for her to come home. It soon dawned on Fannie that she was alone and would have to fend for herself. It was during this blackest of times for her that she began entertaining gentlemen callers. Things began a dramatic change for the better financially as she had to ask her friends for a dollar when they visited, but she didn’t do as well emotionally. She didn’t like the fact that she had to make her way through this life as a woman who took money from men. She began to sink into a deep depression and it only got worse as the winter dragged on.

It was a long about the first of March when the influenza hit the camp and it was a terrible time. Some of Fannies visitors were coughing and it wasn’t long before Fannie was too. One of her frequent visitors was the camp Doctor, one H.K. Atkinson, and after seeing how ill Fannie was left her a bottle of Laudanum, however he neglected to tell her what the dosage was, or if he did she didn’t pay attention, and she quickly downed the entire bottle. She was found the next morning.

It was a sad funeral being as it was hard digging in the camp cemetery that first week in march, the ground wasn’t even thawed good yet, and some of the local towns women raised a fuss about her being buried in the cemetery at all, next to good folk as it were, but they got that all settled by burying her way in the back, right on the fence line and only put up a wooden marker instead of a stone. Most of the town turned out and stood under the gray skies, feeling the brunt of the cold easterly wind and listened to the preacher say his words over her. He didn’t mention of course that he used to visit Fannie. There’s something deep down terrible about being laid to rest in that cold ground. It’s a wonder that a bodies soul could ever find peace wandering that bleak landscape. Some of the good towns women felt it was proper seeing as how she made her living, but then there’s always women like that. Even some men.

In a fit of ironically bad luck Albert and his wife Missielou, Karl’s brother and sister-in-law, arrived mid-June to take Fannie back with them to Wisconsin. Missielou had been after Albert all year about leaving Fannie out there all on her own and how they should do what the bible said and look after kin, even if it wasn’t by blood. So they planned this trip to surprise Fannie and bring her home. Too late, long, long too late. Missielou felt like they had sinned by not acting faster and berated Albert for not sending Fannie any money. Even Albert was worried he might have done damage to his soul by not being more helpful when Fannie had asked.

Albert and Missielou closed out Fannies cabin packing up what little was left after the good towns women has come down and helped themselves to the small amount of jewelry Fannie had collected. Strangely enough no one had taken Fannies prized lace-up boots. Fannie loved those boots as they were the ones Karl had bought for her before they left home to come out here. Apparently the local women had feet that were too big for them so they left them. Supposedly it was bad luck to wear dead peoples shoes anyway. Something about always walking in bad luck. But for sure, one of those women would have chanced that bad luck if those boots had fit. So Missielou packed them up for her daughter Beegee, who was about that size and took them back home with her.

Time went on as is it wont, and soon the creek gave out completely and no one saw any color for weeks, then months. The miners left and the town dwindled until one day a roaring wildfire feeding on the sage and rabbitbrush, swept through the buildings until nothing was left but the stones they used to set the building corners on. Temple, as the camp was now known, ceased to exist. The fire consuming everything in it path, burned over the cemetery, scorching the stones of the good people, and consuming all the wooden markers of the lesser folks, the drunks, the layabouts, some of the other women who entertained men that came after Fannie died. All but one that is. For some unknown reason Fannie’s wooden marker was only burnt a little where it stuck out of the ground. You could still read the writing on it real good. Fannie Polokowski A Friend To The Community 1874-1901 and that was that. The story of a small town and the story of a young woman gone. Alive now only in memories and maybe in that small wooden marker if it’s still there.

When I was Just a Young Boy

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I was just a young boy My fortune yet untold
I have wandered thru the distance
with a camera full of miracles,
Such are promises
All sights are truth
Yet a man sees what he wants to see
And disregards the rest.

When I left my home and my family
I was no more than a boy
In the company of killers
In the middle of the induction center,
Being scared,
Saying so,
Seeking out the safer notions
Where I could safely go
Looking for the places
That I would surely know

Lie-la-lie…..

My apologies and thanks to Paul Simon and the lyrics from the Boxer

As you age things occasionally pop into your head in the form of memories, things from the past that are so vivid and real that they could have happened this morning. This one didn’t however, it happened 51 years ago and whenever I revisit this image Paul Simon’s song “The Boxer” accompanies it and the first phrase that I hear is “When I was just a young boy, my fortune yet untold” plays. I know that my version is incorrect and differs from the original but that’s the way I hear it.

It is almost impossible for me to realize that I was only 18 at the time and had already been in the service for a year. I was stationed on the South Pacific island of Guam in the Trust Territories of the United States and had already used up every new experience that place had to offer. Consequently whenever I had the opportunity I would hop a plane and go to Japan. It is difficult to explain the impact that incredible place had on an impressionable young man but I still feel the exotic-ness of those memories over 50 years later. I judge every new experience I have against those memories in fact. At every available opportunity I wandered through their country like it was another dimension, camera in hand, trying to capture what I was seeing and feeling at the time and failing miserably but loving every second of it.

I remember taking what seemed like thousands of pictures but as I search through my files I find only a pitifully few of them, faded pockmarked Kodachromes, colors becoming transparent, fading like my memory, but what treasures they are. I have pictures of open air markets on the docks with the sea smell and raw fish and the sound of a language that was both harsh and wondrous and magical at the same time.

I have pictures of movie posters that featured the latest Japanese productions of Ninja movies that I never missed on a Saturday afternoon with the locals yelling insults at the bad guys and eating fried rice out of paper boxes with chopsticks.

There’s even a photograph of a Japanese girl who I’m ashamed to admit that now I can only remember her first name, which was Midori, but I remember she was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. You must remember I was young and hadn’t seen everything yet. But she was lovely.

But the one that stands out, the one that I don’t need to see to actually see if you know what I mean, is the one of the temple in Kamakura pictured above. If I could only describe the thunderous silence that surrounded it and the way the moonlight struck the roof and illuminated the garden and the feeling that what ever you might seek in your life was right here right now, I think I could die a happy man, or at least a contented one.

It’s possible I didn’t have all of those thoughts at the time, I was only 18 after all, and there was the beautiful Midori waiting nearby, but something made me take the picture and that something has stayed with me through the years. Many, many memories and experiences have taken place and added up since then but few equal the intensity of emotion that occurs when I see this image again. Just thought I’d share it with you because it’s rare, at least for me, to have a memory that is over half a century old still so vivid and clear.

Note: For those of you that are interested here is a link to a YouTube video that has the original music and lyrics. Sorry about the ad that runs in front of it, thankfully it’s a short one. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYPJOCxSUFc