Looking For Mr GoodGrouse

2016-01-21 Grouse0864

Apparently there has been a tipping  of the scales up in Yellowstone as far as the ratio of female grouse relative to male grouse. The cause of this is so far unknown but the effects are not. Back in the swinging sixties and surreal seventies there were like 27 male grouse to every female grouse and the ladies had their pick of the littler, or the flock as it were. Now the situation has reversed itself and the ratio has swung heavily to the right. And in the mating game it seems like every female is out looking for Mr. GoodGrouse.

Unfortunately this leads to a situation where the females of the species tend to take more and more risks to find a mate. They begin frequenting seedier and seedier nightspots looking for that one chance to find happiness and a future that leads to eggs and chicks and a warm stable nest to raise them in. The tawdrier the bar the lower the chances are of finding a good strong mate that knows where the best seed places are and has a willingness to stay close to the nest to provide the protection the family needs. But desperation overrules caution and common sense and poor decisions are made.

This young female grouse, Ms. Terry Done Flutterfoot has just left a very rough seedmill called The Cracked Shell that makes even the dating section on Craigslist look safe, where she met an unsavory character named Stoney the Nair Wingdrop. Stoney has a bad rep around a place where bad reps are as common as implants at an Adult Film starlets’ sleepover. He has promised to show her a place in the brush nearby where the nest sites are plentiful and the seeds last way into late March. What she doesn’t know and will probably never realize is that Stoney has an arrangement with several of the human bird hunters that lurk around the edges of this rough countryside and for a 10 lb. bag of wild bird seed will deliver a fresh young grouse where the hunters dogs will soon flush her out into the open and at the mercy of their double-barreled 20 gauge shotguns.

What you see above is where Terry suddenly realizes that not only has she not been told the truth, she has been put in grave mortal danger. Her disappointment at being misled is just dawning on her as she hears for the first time the sound of dogs bursting through the brush intent on locating her. She recognizes her betrayal but believes her flight will save her. She is unprepared for the sound of the shotgun as she clears the tops of the sage and mountain mahogany.

This is a sad tale to be sure, but all too true as it points out the risks of looking for love in all the wrong places.