Furlough Day

Bryce3767click to enlarge

As our long time readers are aware we hire only the most qualified and available researchers, general staffers, maintenance crews and accurate snipers, I mean security people for employees here at the Institute. If they’re not top-notch we send them packing.

We are a multinational organization with employees from places as diverse as Lapland, The Belgian Congo now known as Africa, The Falklands, Kansas, The Aleutian Islands, Bhutan, The Peoples Republic of China, although they’re housed in their own barracks with their own internet connections and land for their rice crops, France, but only people from Provence because they will cook for their room and board, Tonga, Suriname and Yellowstone National park. As a  reward for good behavior, I mean excellence in their performance we give them 24 hours off, unpaid, to visit their homelands every three to five years. And with the government shutdown and our grant money frozen this was as good a day as any.

So everybody left including Izzy who as you are no doubt aware is Bill Faulkner’s nieces’ sister-in-law’s daughter’s boyfriend, who does a lot of the ghost writing here at Blog Central. We were excited to get someone from one of the nations foremost literary families to work here and so far he hasn’t done that badly although he tends to let his sentences run together too much but we got him really cheap so…. Anyway the lumpy dufas took off with the rest and took the cord that connects the keyboard to the computer and now we’ve got no way to post easily, I had to step in and post this from my iPhone, and so all I got for you today is a pretty picture.

Sorry.

They should be back in the morning, although our attrition rate has been in the high 70% no-shows historically, so who knows. Anyway enjoy the picture if you can. We’ll be back to normal just as soon as they get the government back in order. And you know that’s going to happen any moment now, right?