We’ve all seen it. Moms behaving badly. This can happen anywhere, at the mall, on the playground, out in the church parking lot. You get kids playing, overprotective mothers watching, Little Snortle pushes Jim, Jim pushes Snortle, moms think one or the other is playing too rough, tempers rise and suddenly you’ve got full contact MMA (Moms Meeting Angrily) going on.
This can happen at the speed of light. One little misplaced head-butt, a surprised squeal from Snortle and Mom goes ballistic. That kid is trying to hurt her baby. Her first impulse is to trample little Jim but Jim’s mom isn’t having any of that because Jim didn’t mean it, and besides that Snortle is an ugly-looking little snot, and before you know it there are enraged bellows, forehead to forehead mayhem, and nevermind what happens to the kids at this point. One of them has to die. Jim was bright enough to see this coming but little Snortle nearly gets trampled in the melee. He’s not sure if he’s been snake bit, or struck by lightning as the conflict escalates. All he knows is when mom gets like this it’s time to put your tail in the air and haul buns out of there.
Buffalo have often been accused of being a few bales short of a truckload and never does this seem to be more true than when these moms get it into their heads that they have been disrespected, humiliated, insulted, or just looked at the wrong way. Once that happens nothing but total destruction can resolve the issue. Snortle’s mom, Heather, has always been a little sensitive and Jim’s mom, Gwyneth has always been a little overbearing and this match has been brewing for quite some time now. They didn’t get along in school, Heather thought Gwyneth had been trying to poach her bull, especially since she caught her rubbing flanks with him at the last neighborhood block party, so it was inevitable that a confrontation was going to happen.
Well, it certainly wasn’t pretty but it also wasn’t deadly. There was some smudged eyeliner and one of them had her hair totally trashed but all in all there were no broken bones or gored underbellies. Unfortunately buffalo being buffalo it didn’t resolve anything either. There is still plenty of bad blood between the two moms and we can fully expect to see this played out again and again. The kids on the other hand have forgotten all about what started it and they’re off to run around and chase each other through the herd until they irritate some other mom and then…. well you know whats going to happen.
This just goes to show you that people are people whether they’re buffaloes, or Baptists, when the ladies get touchy you know you’re going to see moms behaving badly.